Listening to others is an even more important part of communication than speaking. Many more errors and difficulties 【B1】 misunderstanding what you’’ve heard, so it’’s essential to ready yourself to listen with an open mind. Like many of us, you 【B2】 to listen actively, with 【B3】 for accuracy, feeling, meaning, understanding and mutual creativity. You may never have been trained to 【B4】 the other person’’s experience of being understood. 【B5】 you may not 【B6】 that others really hear the message you intend to communicate, others don’’t check to 【B7】 that what you heard is 【B8】 .
What gets in the way of accurate listening When we’’re worried about what we’’re hearing or might hear next or what we might have to do about what we hear, we may very well receive a 【B9】 message. 【B10】 that we will have to "fix it" or "control it" causes us to listen with "filters". We may want to express our own point of view. We may also want to avoid being 【B11】 or being drawn into a conflict, so we 【B12】 what we hear, because we’’re already thinking about what we’’ll say next. It then becomes impossible to hear the speaker’’s true meaning. Clearly in our workplaces, families and friendship, if we 【B13】 what we think we heard instead of what was actually said, the 【B14】 of the message we received will result in responses that aren’’t 【B15】 On the other side, if others don’’t hear us accurately, we won’’t feel valued.
If you want to connect with others and take appropriate actions, you must learn to listen with curiosity, empathy and a deep appreciation for the feelings, reality and creativity of another. You need to ask for 【B16】 and not 【B17】 conclusions. You need to pay close attention and "mirror" back what you hear rather than listening 【B18】 while thinking of other things or listening through filters, 【B19】 or expectations that limit or distort the message’’s 【B20】 meaning. We build trust when others know we understand and value them.