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In our comparison-soaked culture,it´shard to avoid slipping into "Why can´t I"mode.When one of mycolleagues 50 I think is not better than me published a new book,Icouldn´t help 51(complain)how 52(achieve)it seemed tome and what bad luck I had.Negative feelings like this made life dark for us.How to get rid of the harmful effects of comparison needs exploring.Here´swhat I learned:
Don´t compare your insides to someone else´soutsides.
The first time I heard this excellentadvice,I 53(suffer)from terrible envy.My professor´s warningshocked me that "You have no idea what it 54(take)for them toget there".Don´t just owe it to pure luck.Instead,you should fad outwhat´s really going on behind the scenes.
She was absolutely right,yet it´s much 55(easy)to envy what they´ve got than it is to ask the seriousquestion:What are they modeling for me?What have they done to get 56 they are today?When we reflect 57 these questions,we shiftimmediately out of comparison mode and turn inwards.
Transform comparison into celebration.
Admiration and envy are responses pointingus toward what we value most.And once we become aware of what we value,we aremuch better positioned 58(create)a richly satisfying life.If younotice yourself admiring people who take creative risks,bring your full attentionto the part of you that wants to be braver.
Use the success of others as a mirror.
Next time you catch yourself admiring orenvying someone´s success,take a moment to consider:What qualities in theminspire me?Where do I presently display these qualities?Remember the light wesee in 59 can help us see our own.

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